meek and wild beauty

 I am bursting at the seams to share so many things.  I can already tell 2021 will be a big blogging year (maybe...possibly...don't hold me to it).   Let me start off on a super positive note – I have officially lost 10 pounds since January 1, 2021.  WOOHOO!  So, this will be what I learned about my body, and what is working for me.  

Knowing my body - I should say – getting to know my body.  I was slowly but surely losing a pound a week, but the next week after my last weight loss/fitness post I had a day or two where I gained and was gaining weight rapidly every day, and not losing and I struggled with the fact that this may be muscle because my measurements were not changing.  Realizing I needed to understand more about the food I was eating I started evaluating myself more after I ate.  I started keeping a 'food journal' in MyFitnessPal and weighing about 2 or 3 times a day.  Granted, in a lot of circles, this is a HUGE no-no.  Keep in mind that I was not using this as a reference to my weight loss but trying to understand when my body would retain water.  My body thinks it is fun to retain water, so I wanted to see what worked best with my body.  I was not happy with what I found out.  

D.A.I.R.Y.  – I would not be lying to say it is my number one favorite food.  I am huge on cheese, yogurt, milk…all the dairies.  One thing my body did not like and reacted to the most…. delicious dairy.  I took it out of my diet (tearfully) and was shocked by the scale that coming week.  I had lost 3 pounds in one week.  I was still eating plenty, keeping my calories at the right place, etc.  I knew that I had to keep dairy out of my diet until I reached my goal, then I would slowly add it back.  Let me also tell you a crazy thing.  This past week I tried Almond Milk because I really enjoy a sugar-free decaf latte for dessert some evenings.  I had about a cup of Almond Milk (Unsweetened, Plain, read the ingredients) and within 24 HOURS I had gained 5 pounds in water weight.  I am not kidding.  I do not know exactly what happened, but I changed nothing in my diet or exercise other than adding that.  Taking it back out, I was back on track about a day later.  So frustrating.

Water – I finally listened to my husband, as well as 1000 other people tell me this is key to healthy weight loss.  Drinking the recommended amount to start with, then as my body understood I was being nice to it (finally), I started craving more and now it is my go-to after coffee.  I believe this also helps keep my water retention at bay as well as any bloating. 

Anti-Inflammatory Foods - The majority of what I was eating fit on this list, but some did not.  I focused more on foods that really help to reduce inflammation, which will also help in my water retention - among a gazillion other things.  Foods like almonds, fish/seafood, olive oil, berries, leafy greens, mushrooms, peppers, broccoli, garlic, onion, eggs, brussel sprouts, zucchini, green tea, and a lot of others.  Not only did I pay attention to foods on these lists, but also what other foods would do the opposite and cause inflammation... sugar (white, honey, agave, splenda, aspartame), peanuts, sodas, alcohol, iodized salt, gluten, refined carbs, trans fats, and others.  These foods that cause inflammation are easier to avoid if you eat cleaner, and there are lists that contradict themselves - so take the bulk of knowledge and work with it.  For example, there are some dairies that are good anti-inflammatory foods, but after my snafu with dairy, I just listened to my body and not the lists. 

10 pounds feels amazing, but my goal is not fulfilled yet.  I was talking to a friend of mine, and I let her know that this next stage might be the most difficult.  I don’t know where my 36-year-old body will want to be, and if I can even reach my goal.  We shall see.  You know I’ll keep you updated. 😉  I’d be happy just looking killer in a bikini..which will be shipped very soon. Yay!  

I'd like to add a life moment reality- this past weekend was special.  I took a vacation day and had an amazing day-date with my husband (post/s coming soon 😉 it was seriously such a fantastic day).  I ate whatever I wanted.  This included Dairy Queen Chicken Basket (gravy of course), lattes with oat milk, specialty tacos, diet soda, chips & salsa, mall pretzel bites with cheddar cheese sauce & pretzel covered hotdogs, and ending with a cheeseburger meal. ❤ Balance. ❤

 Someone asked me if 2020 had to be a hashtag what would it be?  I’m sure everyone will have a different answer, and that is one thing I love about people.  For me…it would have to be #mulligan…and I don’t even golf.  Can we just pause and hit timeout and restart?  Just blow the whistle already, let’s take a breather and start over.  Mentally that is what my new years resolution is anyway.  I looked at last year’s, and I am literally doing them over again.  Taking off the one’s I’ve accomplished and added new ones along with those that didn’t even get touched because #2020.  

My Papa-Bear resolution affects a lot of things.  Ready…No Self Shopping.  Ugh!  Like a dagger to the heart!  I made a list of necessities, and that is the only kind of self-shopping I will be doing.  I did get a gift card for Christmas that I haven’t used yet, so I will have one last hooray.  

My Mama-Bear sized resolution is just as hard.  Eating healthy and exercising.  I’m adding the value of friendship to this one this year.  My best friend and I are doing it together, keeping each other accountable.  We made up a game to it and will have a points system with obvious rewards like a girl’s night or spa day.  I’m excited about it.  Snakin’ Momma WILL become Sexy Momma!  

The Baby-Bear resolutions are the most numerous and easily completed. They are more about self-care instead of hard self-altering goals.   Keeping my nails painted and self-tanner on point and blogging at least every 2 weeks.  Keeping the house tidy & organized (maybe a little harder).  Spending time with Jesus & journaling every day.  

I’m going to be honest because that is why I love blogging.  2020 wasn’t a bad year for my family.  It was actually a very good year.  Both my husband and I were able to get better jobs that pay us more.  We became closer than ever because we had a tough conversation about separating and came to the same conclusions.  Now because of that understanding, we can love each other better than before and have a deeper desire and confidence in one other.  We discovered a lot of things we still have in common and realized our goals and are now striving for them together.  Our son is a better person than he was a year ago thanks to increased family time.  I think 2021 will be a harder year than in 2020.  Not better or worse, but harder….and a different kind of hard.  Maybe not emotionally, but in a consistent-active-work kind of way.  I will have to work harder in 2021 on a lot of things that were simply easier in 2020.  

I learned more about myself – good & bad things of course.  I also was able to firm up on a lot of things I was on the fence about.  For example, I am more solid in my political views, am even more certain that I hate living in the Land of Lincoln, and convinced that I feel more myself with false lashes, self-tanned skin, and painted nails.  Bad things about myself…I am incredibly selfish, extremely prideful, and horribly lazy.

My selfishness stems from the fact that I simply do not care about others very well.  I don’t ask questions because I could care less.  Yikes.   That has to change.  To love others, you need to care about them, want to learn more about them, want to talk to them for no self-related reason.  I learned all this because I came face to face with people who are the same way, and the havoc of their words and actions affected others in a way that shook me.  I realized I had too much in common with the disgusting behavior and was humbled.

Good things I learned about myself – my skin is a warm tone; hence cool tones look terrible on me.  This was a huge discovery!  I love fashion and makeup and now I have a clear understanding of colors to wear.  I also found the perfect hair color and am praying that the manufactures never stop making it.   

I also learned random things like….

• I hate the taste of Rum and love the taste of Gin.

• Lunges are the key to better legs.

• Not a total homebody like I thought I was

• Silence is wisdom

• Summer is my favorite season

And experiencing new things like…. Chili Mac.

Another thing I realized is that my blogs do not have to be perfect paragraphs of well-placed words and rhythmic sounding sentences.  They are thoughts that I need to write, that I need to share, that I need to publish.  

How about you?  Will you try again?  Was it a good year?  What did you learn?  

I've only missed one day in the last 13 days.   I have discovered my drive, and also discovered that I needed more than one sports bra, one pair of workout leggings, and one pair of athletic socks.  haa haa!  😆😂  Which is why I'm excited to tell you about my Calvin Klein find at my local T.J. Maxx! First of all...I love Calvin Klein.  So I was thrilled to find this sports bra and leggings!  I was looking at getting another pair of athletic leggings and sports bra so that I wouldn't be doing a load of laundry every day.  During the memorial day sales I was shopping around and found amazing sales at Old Navy, but of course I would need to order my favorite pair because it wasn't in my local store.  The price was phenomenal though! Then I thought I'd look at our local T.J. Maxx just in case.  I found these Calvin Klein pieces for the same price as the SALES at Old Navy!  YAY!  My original tribal print sport bra and leggings are from Target. 




I would love to report that I can see an instant change...but no...not at all.  I hate that exercise takes time and you can't see results instantly.  U.G.H. It reminds me SO MUCH of paying off debt.  I literally feel like exercise/eating-right and debt reduction is the SAME EXACT thing.  It's saying "no" to the now, so that you can really enjoy life rightly in the future.  It's not fun during it, but afterwards its one of the greatest things of your life.

I do not remember a time when I was not a dreamer.  From my earliest memory, everything I saw had life and noises were full of wonder and mystery.  I was a weird child.  Luckily enough I did have amazing friends that tolerated my strange obsession with fantasy-thinking and loved me for who I was. (Thank you Krystle, Jenny G, Glo, Jenny B, Ashlee, and Kae)

Good thing about weird children is that they grow up to be eccentric adults.  Truth be told, we are just really fun people...you know we are. 😂  There was a magic all around me, and I can still feel it today.  A feeling that starts in your chest and moves outward...it's a calm excitement that has phantom tingles as it travels.  I believe the words that have been circulating around recently are..."spark joy".

In my earlier post about our Minimalism transition, I talked about this a little bit.  You can read about it here.  I want to talk about what happens when all you wear, everyday, are things that create this feeling of joy.  An amazing thing happens...

You feel it.


It is another brand of happiness (a more expensive and well made version), and it shares space with confidence.  I believe this happens because you are connecting to artistic reflections of yourself, granted you've got to do a bit of soul searching at the beginning (hardest but most rewarding part).  There is more to this than just connecting to a article of clothing, its the creativity that helped design it, the skills that made it...a creative-designed-skill that connects you to its Beauty.  It's the same force that keeps us silent starting into each sunrise and sunset.  It's the same pull that draws us to stillness on each beach crashing with gentle waves.  I believe with everything that I am, this is an attribute of God that we are uniting to.  It's something that He wants us to remember about Him.  Like a thank you note that was sent to us, or a sign that leads us back to Himself.


With that said...imagine your life putting on something that genuinely sparks joy for you...everyday.  Think about how your days would start and end differently knowing that you would carry this feeling about you...All Day.  Realize that big things would happen from one small act.  That is why creating an environment around you that carries these 'joy-messages' to you actually changes your life because it transcends created things to the One that Created Everything.  💓

Now, enough of this deep speech.  I LOVE THIS SWEATER!  PomPoms spark joy for me, so do natural colors, and the color white.  Leather and blue jeans will always be a staple in my wardrobe.  Also, something you might not notice is that I do not own a top that has a sharp collar on it.  Those bring me the opposite of joy. 😂  I don't know why, I've never liked them. To be fair, I have cut the collar off of this shirt...like I have on all of my sharp collared shirts.  I make them all mandarin collars.  True story.  Peter Pan collars are fine with me, I just don't own any.

Like I said...Eccentric.  😏





So...what are you waiting for?  Maybe take some time to go through your closet or home and evaluate the items that connect you to something/Someone much greater.  💗